Welcome to Brained

A few million years ago, according to scientists, the human brain evolved into the largest, most complex human organ, capable of a billion and a half thoughts per second.

Fat lot of good it’s done me.

I’m Orli. A few of you (four of five), know me from my first book, I Feel Bad, a collection of drawings in which I obsess about my guilt brought on by being a Jew, a woman, a mum, and generally by being alive. The book was turned into a primetime NBC comedy about an Indian woman working at a gaming company. Spoiler alert: it was canceled after one season.

Others may know me from the radio show I hosted on WLIR in New York. It was called the English Muffin show. Yes, really. 

I’ve had a hundred jobs, none as challenging as managing my brain, which seems to need something different. Fucked if I know what that is. An ‘off’ switch, perhaps.

Several months ago, I opened a Substack account. It’ll be fun, I told myself. Predictably, as soon as I did this, I couldn’t write. I couldn’t draw. I posted nothing.

Why?

Meet Brainy.

I’ve had a love-hate relationship with my brain from the beginning. I look for ways to shut it up. I draw, I swim, I journal, I sculpt, I read, I listen to music, I burn dolls – more on this later. I walk, I breathe, I stretch.

I’m fairly high maintenance.

So, what is Brained?

A space for myself. An experiment. An attempt to shut Brainy up.

A search for Funny.

Funny is everywhere. But with the current state of the world, Funny can be elusive. Here’s the note I’ve had on my wall for years.

A cheap reminder since I can no longer drink. Thank you, menopause. Funny is all that’s left, and I can’t think of anything funnier than my neurotic brain.

Some of my favorite topics are guilt, anger, my fucking hormones, control, relationships, my fucking hormones, art, music, swimming, and being a mum. Also, my fucking hormones.

How it works:

I’ll panic every Saturday. I’ll post every Sunday. This will be free to all.

Posts might be crude and uncrafted, finished (maybe), and unfinished. Many drawings will be available for purchase once I get my shit together and, if Brainy doesn’t get in my way, I’ll get to other paid stuff eventually. 

If you subscribe, don’t worry, I’m not enterprising enough to sell my mailing list and I wouldn’t know where to begin.

You might relate. You might even feel superior. You’ll probably be glad you’re not me. If you have a similar brain, you might laugh, especially the next time you find yourself brained.